Wait. Don’t tell me. I know what you’re thinking.
See, ampoule what had happened was….
The long and short of it is this: I’m lucky enough to travel the world speaking at tech conferences (and thank you Jesus it’s on someone else’s dime!). Unfortunately with all that time-zone hopping comes flights with no wifi, I-just-took-a-red-eye-and-have-no-idea-where-I-am-or-what-time-is-it confusion and you-idiot-why-did-you-put-your-laptop-in-your-checked-bag self flagellation.
Luckily for all of us, conference season is done for me until February so I can now devote my time the things that really matter: cooking, finding a decent glass of wine in Pittsburgh, and making fun of the idiots in the sports world with you fine Divas.
Let’s do this.
Drake is trolling all of us and the sports world is in on the joke
The rapper Drake released the music video for his song Hotline Bling and, as the folks over at Bleacher Report put it, it’s in typical Drake goofery. The internet went crazy.
There’s comes a time in every writer’s process when you know that there isn’t a way to make better what is already great (<– and that sentence is why they hired me, you guys). Take it away, Twitter!
So that’s how Louisville got all those recruits
I have been dying – D Y I N G – to talk to someone – A N Y O N E – about what is going on in Louisville. Not because people associated with big-time college basketball programs are allegedly hiring escorts for the players’ use ($50 for sex? That’s all, ladies? Really?). And not even because Rick Pitino is denying that he had any involvement in it or knowledge of it which…(this side eye I’ve got happening right now….).
Nope. I want to talk about this because people think Pitino is getting fired. Fired? Really!? This is the man who admits – HE ADMITS! – that he had sex with a woman in a restaurant booth, told us how long (short?)(yeah, yeah, too easy) the counter lasted, gave her $3000 to get an abortion, and did.not.lose.his.job. Seriously, Rick Pitino and his antics are better than HBO.
Chicago sports in 25 words or less
Derrick Rose’s face mask looks uncomfortable. I’m sorry, I hate preseason anything. I’ll come up with better stuff when they open their season Tuesday against the Cavs.
A place kicker – albeit, a great one – is now the Bears’ all-time leading scorer yet Halas Hall is confused as to how we lost to the pitiful Lions.
Not looking good, friends. Hey on the bright side all of you bandwagoners only have one game left to pretend like you care.
Chicago White Sox
Nothing new here. I just wanted an excuse to point and laugh at Alex Rodriguez who overthrew a football and broke a television screen on his first day at Fox Sports.